LinuxLefty's personal blog - Funny

China is not for tall people

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 12:00:11 -0600

At the school there is a stairway with a low clearance. I need to duck every time so I don't beam myself in the head! Check out how low the ceiling is!!!

The T.I.P Facilitators

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 12:00:21 -0600

Daniel - The Gangster
Patrick - The One Thats Up To No Good
Peter - The Geek
Nancy - The One You Can Depend On
Julia - The Innocent One
Laura - The One Thats Always Hungry
Holly - The Princess
Preston - The Funny Guy
Krista - The Stylish One
Syrena - The Drama Queen
Doro - The Good Friend
Kristi - The Cutie Pie
Jackie - The Tiny Dangerous One
Brandon - The Jock
Wouter - The Tower

Sarcasm

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 16:40:58 -0700

I saw this pin today and I agree with it completely. Sarcasm is definite a survival skill here in China.

Bad English

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Sat, 28 Feb 2009 02:21:08 -0700

China Unicom is a very large Chinese company (the 3rd largest mobile carrier in the world). However, check out the horrible English that they have on their website!

Those who are shrewd-brained, never do time consuming and laborious matters, be longing and good at communications and praise highly humanization science and technology;

Short message realizes using of tongue not hands! 3-minute recording time leaves enough space to you and all speeches can be sent to the others ear in original flavor. Voice technology completely releases the inconvenient keystroke, more time and energy saved, fashionable and fresh and particular. Voice short message is worth using!

The latest, most fashionable and most natty character short message is provided. You dispense with boring input, no worry about looking for larruping short message. All is solved for you in the hot Sina Card comfortably.

http://www.bj.chinaunicom.com/english/products/ydtxyw/ydhyyw/file20.html

Be Careful What You Buy

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Sat, 28 Feb 2009 00:12:31 -0700

Laura and I were in the supermarket and saw an entire pigs head chilling in the meat section. In China it is quite common to see pig's snout or ears, but this is the first time I saw an entire head, haha

Meetings

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 03:00:24 -0700

Wherever I go, there are always lots of meetings! I guess there are necessary evil, but they are such a waste of time. In light of this, I absolutely loved today's Dilbert comic

Why Is a Hamburger Called a Hamburger if it is Made of Beef?

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 03:31:03 -0600

Yesterday I was riding to school and attempting not to get run over by yet another insane driver .... or biker .... or pedestrian who thinks traffic lights are for decoration and this is some bizarre game of EXTLINK:@http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frogger|frogger@. Anyhow, as I was going through the morning chaos, it suddenly hit me:

Why is a hamburger called a hamburger if it is made out of beef?

Consulting my good and all knowing friend EXTLINK:@http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamburger|wikipedia@ and my fool-proof intuition, I came up with the following three possible explanations:

At a fair, some guy serving meatballs got the idea to flatten them for better portability. Since they were made of pork, they got the name "hamburger". The only problem with this explanation, is why is it now made of beef?
At a different fair (what is up with all the fairs anyway? I guess that's where the smartest chefs go to work, lol), a guy was serving sausage patties. They ran out of pork and decided to use a cow instead. They found the beef to be rather bland so they put lots of gunk on top and voilà the hamburger was born. The name of place place? Hamburg, New York.
This is simply a mystery of life, to be contemplated while riding through Beijing traffic ... kind of like the EXTLINK:@http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buttered_cat_paradox|buttered cat paradox@. But I'll think about that on a different bike ride.

What is your take on this?

Funny Picture

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 09:57:45 -0600

I have a bunch of new pictures to upload, but I took a really funny one today I wanted to share with you all.

On my way home from school, I saw this small bicycle carrying a HUGE load of Styrofoam. I passed the bicyclist and then took a picture for you all. I later saw the same guy with the bike parked at a street corner. However, the load was so large that the Styrofoam was laying on the ground and the bicycle was pointing up in the air, lol.

It's kind of strange, here in China. People use cars to transport people and bicycles to transport goods. Since there is so much traffic, you hardly see any trucks on the road. You'll see people with a boat load of hula-hoops, shoes in shoe boxes, etc, etc on the back of their bicycles.

Christmas Decorations by Geeks

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 13:07:27 -0700

Tony Hansen, in Orlando Florida, used about 45,000 lights and $10,000 worth of equipment to rig up one awesome Christmas display. It is very over the top, and I wouldn't want to be his neighbor, but it is cooooool

You can read about it in the EXTLINK:@http://www.orlandosentinel.com/features/consumer/orl-geeklights2307dec23,0,2223946.story?coll=orl_tab01_layout|Orlando Sentinel@ and I've posted YouTube videos below.

Enjoy

W00T! I Gots Free Monnies!

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 13:24:35 -0700

Something really strange happened to me this week. I was going over my credit card statement and there were four separate transactions listed with a architectural magazine. I knew that I never subscribed to such a magazine ( especially since I am a computer scientist, not an architect ), so I gave them a call.

However, what I found was very surprising.

It turns out that these were not charges but credits. Somehow the magazine was alerted that someone had tried to charge four gift subscriptions on my credit card. So, they immediately canceled the orders and credited my card for the four charges.

The funny thing was that I was never charged for those amounts, so somehow the magazine mistakenly thought that I was changed and give me about $300, free. I called them up to let them know the error that they have made, but they said that everything was fine according to their records.

It's kindof funny to get my statement and see that I have a negative balance, meaning that the credit card technically owes me money

Need Sleep

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 14:27:51 -0700

I initially thought this week wouldn't be very busy, but school never fails to find something to fill up my time . I have a large group project due this week ( it seems like I have one of those every week ) so I've been staying up late working on that.

Today's foxtrot comic really expresses the way I feel right now. Need more sleep

Click for full size image

Oh, and while we're on the topic of comics, I saw a great Dilbert comic, too which is also attached below.

Click for full size image

Which OS Are You?

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Fri, 02 Mar 2007 10:04:13 -0700

Have you ever wondered what operating system you are most like?

LOL, I didn't think so. However, there is a fun quiz you can take that will (attempt to) match your personality with an operating system. Take the quiz and post what operating system you are. My quiz result was slackware linux

I especially liked the part: "...you are often mistaken as insane"

The quiz can be found on EXTLINK:@http://bbspot.com/News/2003/01/os_quiz.php|BBspot@

How to Install Vista and How to Grade Exams

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Sun, 11 Feb 2007 20:17:10 -0700

This week I came across two funny "How to's".

The first was a guide on how to successfully install Windows Vista. The person who made the how-to spent over 12 hours fighting with the installer. He downloaded countless incompatible drivers and encountered numerous hardware conflict issues. He finally figured out how to install Vista and wrote the following tutorial on it:

In addition, I came across EXTLINK:@http://www.rvc.cc.il.us/faclink/pruckman/humor/grading.htm|A Guide to Grading@. It's a good read and a good laugh. I've had some teachers that must grade like this

Comics week-in-review

nospam@example.com (LinuxLefty) — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 15:01:00 -0700

As I was growing up, we hardly ever got the paper. It was only when important news or the day after Christmas sales advertisements were printed that we purchased a copy. When we did get the paper, Natalie, Philip, and I always knew the most important part to dive straight into: the comics!

Now, we still hardly get the paper, but thanks to the Internet, I can subscribe to a few of my favorite comic strips and get them daily. I've decided to include my favorite ones in this post for you, too!

Continue reading "Comics week-in-review"